“I held Isabella until the morning light. I sang to her through my tears. I had no voice because of the breathing tube they placed down my throat for the surgery. I didn’t want to give her back and I can still, so vividly, see her tiny face and hands. I cherish the little knitted cap she was wearing that night. It’s one of the few physical ties I have to her. That and the casting of her feet the hospital staff had made for me.”
International recording artist Jennifer Bone aka Jenny B, had always dreamed of having twins, and her odds were very good, as twins run on both sides of her family. So, the mother of three, was beyond thrilled when she found out she was pregnant with twins.
Her daughter, Giovanna, was just over a year old at the time, “Giovanna and I spent so much time dancing around the living room to “3 Little Birds” by Bob Marley. They played it on Nickelodeon every time we turned on the television and we just loved when it came on,” Jenny says. “We had so much fun feeling the girls in my belly, and I definitely ate way too much chocolate cake. I couldn’t wait for Gio to meet her sisters.”
Unfortunately, the elation was dampened when doctors discovered her twins had a rare condition, where they had not separated, but were sharing the same sac. Jenny’s doctor recommended she be admitted to the hospital, once she was six months along. So, the day after her oldest son’s high school graduation party, Jenny began her extended stay in the hospital, guitar in hand.
Just three days into her hospital stay, the twin girls, now named Isabella and Anabella, were in distress, and Jenny was quickly moved to surgery to have an emergency c-section. As she awakened from her anesthesia, the doctors informed her that Isabella had not survived, and Anabella’s life was in danger.
“I held Isabella until the morning light,” Jenny says. “I sang to her through my tears. I had no voice because of the breathing tube they placed down my throat for the surgery. I didn’t want to give her back and I can still, so vividly, see her tiny face and hands. I cherish the little knitted cap she was wearing that night. It’s one of the few physical ties I have to her. That and the casting of her feet the hospital staff had made for me.”
Anabella went on to spend the next almost seven months in intensive care. When Anabella was finally released, she came home with a trach and a seizure disorder.
The next few months were trying, but Jenny says, “As Anabella became stronger, I slowly started to regain my will to perform again.”
Jenny B. had already done a handful of tours in Sweden, and the fans were wanting her back, so her manager put a tour together, which included some shows at the local prisons. And it was at a prison show, that the inmates were requesting – you guessed it – Bob Marley. “I gave in,” Jenny says. “I sang “3 Little Birds” ‘Don’t worry ’bout a thing, cuz every little thing gonna be alright.’ And there was an inmate, a grown man, moved to tears.”
“When the fellas and I returned home to the States, I was finally able to write a song for Isabella. It just flowed,” Jenny explains. “There is so much love, and healing, and power in music. I believe that Isabella can hear her song all the way into heaven, but actually, she’s never really left me.”
The song Jenny B. wrote for Isabella, “Heaven Is Holding My Baby,” is a true testament to that healing power Jenny speaks of. This poignant song is being released today – October 15th – National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day, in conjunction with a special event, held at Grandview Community Church in Colorado Springs. Attendees will take part in The Wave Of Light – a worldwide, progressive candle-lighting ceremony honoring babies that died too soon.
It takes a lot of strength, exquisite wisdom, and bravery to open your heart and show it to the world. And that’s what Jenny B. does perfectly in this song.
“I’m releasing this song, “Heaven Is Holding My Baby” because it’s not about trying to make people sad, it’s just a way of getting people to talk about grief and working through the loss,” Jenny says. “It’s not just a song for me, but for all of the mothers and fathers who have lost a child. There are no words to say to these parents, I just want them to know that they are not alone.”
Find out more about Jenny B. and her music by visiting her website here, JennyBOfficial.com, and follow her on social media via the links below.